MUSIC REVIEW: The Fall - Live at the Witch Trials (1979)

Yirkah: No wonder everybody thought these guys were a punk band! What with that jingle-jangle keyboard, clean chorusy guitar and 8-minute epic closer? ANARCHY! ANARCHY! OI! OI! OI! On a serious note, I was born a woman. On an even more serious note, this album is actually very punky. In fact, most of these songs---if stripped down and pumped through a distortion pedal thing-a-ma-jig---would fit comfortably on any punk album worth listening to. There's not a weak song on here. Highlights include the paranoid ramblings of the excellent mid-tempo album opener "Frightened", the catchier-than-catchy "Rebellious Jukebox", the kick-your-ass-in frantic attack of "No Xmas for John Quays", the awkward circus rock vibes of "Mother-Sister", the bouncy, keyboard-driven "Two Steps Back", and the snotty should've-been-a-classic punk rocker "Futures and Pasts". The production is superb. I mean....have you heard the drum sound on this thing? It makes me want to strip off all my clothes and walk down the sidewalk, waving my wiener at the passing auto-MOBILES. (pronounced "mo-biles" not "mo-beels" because I'm a southern gentleman with a coke problem). There's a neverending debate among the Fall fan community about where to begin your journey into the wonderful and frightening world of The Fall---28 studio albums as of this review. "Where should I start?", they often ask me, followed by "Hey! Get your penis out of my ass!". My answer to these newbies is this album. "Just start at the beginning." This is The Fall at *arguably* their most accessible and it features the idiosyncrasies that would follow the band (i.e. Mr. Smith) throughout their career. And the hooks? This album is hookier than a pirate with a hook...FOR A COCK!!! Speaking of cocks, why is the "black people like to eat fried chicken" stereotype considered offensive? Fried chicken kicks ass! There are worse things to be called than "somebody who loves to eat the most awesomest food on the fuckin' planet". I'm no asshole. Speaking of assholes, this newcomer Mark E. Smith is awfully confident and witty for a 22-year old. He arrived ready-made as the bitter, sarcastic, lower-class intellectual that we know today. "Live at the Witch Trials" gets a NINE! *********


Bernhardt: Hey this isn't a live album. What a fucking gyp. F 

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